My own generator is bigger than yours!
Oh yeah!!
Lagos is a big city, sorry mega city. What about the unnecessary blaring of horns of vehicles in a traffic jam even when there’s no hope of easing up? Someone once said the hooters never had toys to play with in their childhood.
The okada, as motorcycles used for transportation are called, are in a world of their own. The okada go into the nooks and crannies of the city where commercial vehicles dare not ply.
Commercial vehicles dare not ply the backstreets because their very state if it exists, is simply dilapidated. By the way, strangers riding on okada are strictly on their own. That’s because rides on okada could end anywhere, apart from the passengers’ destinations.
For some, it could end in the hospital. That’s because the okada riders, while demonstrating their dexterity on the two-wheeler, might collide with another okada, a car or truck, or a stroller or simply end up in the ditch.
If any of these happens, and it’s not too grievous, a self-respecting passenger would simply get up, dust his clothes, thank God for little mercies and proceed on his journey.
Those that are less self-respecting will, however, be engaging the okada rider in needless debates that would often degenerate into shouting matches.
Incidentally, the okada riders have a kind of solidarity with each other at times like this. At the end of the day, in most cases, the passengers might have themselves to blame.
For some other passengers, an okada ride might be a race to hell. Hell in the sense that they might be kidnapped, robbed or even killed.
Lagos is a good example of unity, yes unity of the haves on one side and the have-nots on the other. While the have-nots are trying to do what they call business, the haves are trying to maintain their businesses.
Business in Lagos could range from owning non-existent houses, travelling agencies whose proprietors do not know where even one airport is situated. Advance fee fraud is for the big guys, and you have siblings lying to their siblings abroad that they’re developing properties for them.
The advance fee fraud is so serious that a former head of state and brass hat in the army allegedly fell victims of creative fraudsters.
The smaller ones are done by traders selling fake products to unsuspecting buyers. When you buy anything in the traffic gridlock, chances are that ninety percent of them are fake. They range from pirated books and CDs to far from genuine wristwatches.
In Lagos, you see university graduates coming out of their hovels at noon wrapped in their towels because they’re jobless. But then, most of them by 6pm, are bathed and getting ready to join the hustle and bustle of Lagos night life.
If public water supply works in Lagos, it’s probably for the fast depleting elite class. Someone once said the elite was not up to five percent of the population.
For the rest, merciful landlords dig boreholes for them. But then, the boreholes come at a fee into the coffers of government.
Electricity?
Well, electricity is mainly supplied to a majority of the people through generators of various sizes. Nigerians being what they are have long cultivated the habit of laughing at themselves.
The smallest of the generators is called, ‘I better pass my neighbor’. The very nomenclature shows there’s a lot of oppression in the country.
Nigeria is suspected to be the country with the highest number of generators.
My generator is bigger than yours!
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